a real rival

after some pretty densely packed nights of reading and writing for a deadline (and a hard drive crash) i will be back in the studio today. it's been a few days and i am feeling a bit rusty. rusty not from lack of thought- but from the clattering of thoughts in my head. i am trying to distill some of them. my AT is helpful and readings make some of it clearer. but when it comes down to it i am the one left to decide what i am about and what is important to me and in my work. chris gave me some agnes martin to read- that has been insightful in terms of a way of thinking about working.

when i left the studio (i did get in one good day this week) i was making larger (30 x 40) drawings with dropped graphite and some traffic drawings from dutton street at rush hours. felix told me the other day that this will be a "breakout semester" for me. i agree. it comes down to me and my own work. and i am a worthy opponent. to quote "pot kettle, black" from wilco's Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, "..i myself have found a real rival in myself. i am hoping for a re-arrival of myself".

-love, the rival